I've suffered from depression on and off for 32 years so far and faced suicidal ideation several years ago when my three children were very small. (Including 5 months of my last pregnancy)
I've been thinking a lot lately about my friends who have lost loved ones close to them to suicide and my heart aches for them. I see a lot out in the media for suicide awareness that discusses how we need to "know how to look for the signs" and how we need to be there for our loved ones and tell them we love them. And I agree. However, I feel called to weigh in and say that people suffering from suicidal thoughts need to feel EMPOWERED to seek help for themselves. They need to know it is ok to tell close loved ones about their feelings and needs, and that they can go get help from a doctor or psychiatrist. People need to recognize the warning signs within THEMSELVES that something is wrong and that the disease of depression has taken root (and can worsen if untreated!) A knight in shining armor will not come save you from a "suicidal cliff"; you have to fight the dragon yourself and you CAN. You do NOT have to suffer in silence, guilt, shame, and fear of "burdening" someone else with your "issues." You are sick!!! You are NEVER a burden! It is an illness that can have severe consequences and outcomes! You cannot sit around and wait for someone to recognize something might be off with you or read your mind. Your friends, family, and medical professionals are happy to help. But you have to TELL them what's happening. You have to share WHAT you need help with. Household chores? Groceries? Childcare? Time to take a nap? A lunch outing?
In this old video (it went viral on Facebook years and years ago), I discuss very candidly what it feels like to be in a suicidal mindset; so it may shed some light as to a reason WHY some people take this dark path. I can only speak for myself, but I wanted to share in case it helps someone else.
Many loved ones left behind after loss blame themselves or feel regretful that they weren't "more helpful" to their person in some way...that perhaps they might still be here if they had "done more." I can't imagine the pain of that burden!!!!! When I was not in my right mind and felt like ending my life, it was coming from a place of love and sacrifice (as you will hear me discuss in the video). Some people might judge and say "how can you be so selfish to kill yourself and leave your family behind!?" and I get it. I discuss this in detail in the video and hope it answers that question, brings a new light and lifts a bit of burden from your heart.
Wishing you love and light!!!! Let's end this stigma!!!!!
